"I desire what God desires, and that's inward beauty, chasteness, innocence, simplicity."

Dilemma: need to decide whether to go to this place or that place tomorrow evening. whatever i choose, i want to do it for all the right reasons that are pleasing and glorifying to God, not for my own selfish or even prideful reasons or motives. for Your sake Lord, and for the sake of Your people. need to pray and ask God to search my heart. need to hear from Him.

Prince William is getting married tomorrow to Kate Middleton at Westminster Abbey. Aww I really like weddings. Hmmm I wonder when it will be my turn...

Okay... back to eyes on Jesus alone!!!

A Special Good Friday to Remember

Good Friday: the day that my Savior was tortured and suffered big time and died on the cross for my sins, my guilt, my shame -- for ME. Let us remember Jesus and His great sacrifice ♥

Today is also definitely a Good Friday to remember because of what happened tonight in Tad's Steakhouse in downtown, SF. I cried tears of joy (and it's been weeks since I've cried actually!) just listening to my sisters Michelle, Vicky, and Moon share about what's been happening in their lives. Even though on the surface it may seem like sucky things or how things don't turn out the way they desperately want, I definitely see God being powerfully at work in their lives and I feel and see His amazzzzzing love so evident in the lives of my beloved sisters. I was just so overwhelmed by His love that it moved me to tears. Hah, me crying inadvertently started a cascade because Moon started to cry as she was trying to comfort me and then Vicky got teary-eyed. Michelle didn't cry (yet). But later on even Michelle had tears welled up in her eyes.

God, you are just beyond words. You are so powerful and mighty! And You are absolutely sovereign! Thanks so much for loving us in the ways you do and loving us so perfectly. You are PERFECT for each of us. Your Love is enough. You Alone are enough. Thank you X infinity for sending us Jesus Christ who took our place on the cross so that we could be beautiful, free of shame, no longer prisoners to sin or the law, so that we could have this eternally glorious love relationship with You forever and ever! Thank You for the cross, Lord.

“God is teaching me that it's not about me. I need to be faithful, and He will speak through me. I'm not going to worry so much about being successful or relevant. I want to awaken in my generation something that's been dead. I want to make the Word flesh and blood for my generation, to show them that living out the Gospel is something greater and more mysterious, with more adventures than we've learned." - Bethany Dillon

Amen sister!

P.S. Please let me know if you would like a copy of my V-SET (Volunteer Summer English Teachers) 2011 summer mission support letter! Thanks :)

"Make Holy Week Holy to the Lord"

Make Holy Week Holy to the Lord

April 17, 2011 | by: John Piper | Category: Commentary
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The week between Palm Sunday and Easter is not intrinsically holy, except that all time is holy, since it belongs to God. But we can make it holy by setting it apart for sacred focus.

May I encourage you to do that, for the sake of seeing more of the greatness of Christ. He reveals himself through his word. Take up his word and focus your attention on him in his last hours. Set aside some time this week to fix your gaze steadily on him as he loves you to the uttermost (John 13:1).

The passages in the Gospels that record his final hours are:

* Matthew 26:17-28:20
* Mark 14:21-16:8
* Luke 22:1-24:53
* John 13:1-21:25

You may find that a volcano erupts in your soul. Like it did for me 28 years ago.

Could I talk to you sometime this afternoon?
About some things I know I'm reading into
Because you and me come at this differently
And I'm just trying to be honest with you
Now that I've found you in the most unexpected places
You were right in front of my face
You could be the one that I could hold on to forever
Hold on to forever
You could be the one
Yeah, I get it
Go change the subject
But I can't forget how much this seems to fit
When you feel this way
Everything sounds so cliche
But I'll try to explain my side of this
Now that I've found you in the most unexpected places
You were right in front of my face
You could be the one that I could hold on to forever
Hold on to forever
You could be the one
Maybe you are the kind that doesn't want to say it
I should just let you be
But maybe if I spoke up that would be enough
To give my mind some peace

You Could Be The One - Bethany Dillon

I had forgotten that I liked this song. Waiting for that day :)

Breaking 6

Congrats to my baby brother Sam who ran under 6 minutes on the mile at today's track meet!!! His time was 5:57. Even I've never broken 6 on the mile before! So proud of that little dude, who's growing up (by God's grace) into quite a fine young man, if I do say so myself >.<

But sitting on the bleachers today at Kezar, watching the little Presidio middle schoolers run and cheering them on... man it brought back sooooo many memories. Memories of my younger years running track in middle school (yeah Presidio Panthers!) and in high school (woot! Lowell Cardinals!). I remember the smell of the grass and the rubbery track and the feeling of a mixture of excitement+dread whenever I'm racing on the field. It's an awesome feeling mixed with some fear, I guess of losing and letting the team/myself down. Haha I remember I got to (by God's grace) compete in All City Finals for every year that I ran track throughout my running career. Key races I remember winning were the All City Girls' 800m dash in 8th grade and 4x100m relay senior year of high school, for which I ran the anchor leg and we made it to State Championships! Of course we only made it for trials =/ bud since we placed like dead last during trials, we didn't get to compete in finals but still, twas a great honor to even get to go to the State meet representing SF! And I still have my State sweatshirt :)

Anyway, it's Sam's last year in middle school (8th grade going on high school! eeck) and both he and I hope that he makes it to All City Finals this year. Stay tuned and lemme know if you wanna come out to one of his meets with me (not very many left) before All City to support and encourage the little man :)

Stuff I Wanna Do

Stuff (some random) that I wanna do. The list is in no particular order.

1) see Chris Tomlin perform live
2) watch Soul Surfer
3) go to a bar, the kind you see in movies
4) white water rafting/kayaking/canoeing/rowboating
5) paintballing
6) real mountain climbing
7) go to Hawaii with my (currently non-existent) boyfriend or future husband
8) win souls for Christ
9) stay up all night or sleep outdoors and watch the stars
10) ride the bus with friends for long period of time and talk or look out the window
11) ride a train and go far far away
12) ride on the back of a motorcyle
13) drive for an extended period of time
14) form a band and do vocals/harmony or play guitar
15) learn bass guitar and percussion
16) race Victor who runs really fast and actually win (or not feel bad when I lose)
17) eat at Red Robin or a buffet one day when I'm feeling really hungry
18) go to a carnival
19) share the Gospel and my faith with people every day
20) play with babies and toddlers and cute kids
21) eat at unlimited sushi buffet place in Davis or Hayward
22) get a tatoo
23) witness a (human) birth
24) live my life every day secure in God's Love
25) think of Jesus in every situation I'm in
26) go on a road trip with my girlfriends (Galatians study sistahs!)
27) download a bunch of songs onto my iPod
28) design a thumb-tact wall with pictures and memories to bring down to UCLA
29) afford to buy something that Sam would like for his 14th birthday
30) finish watching LOTR 2 and 3
31) build a mini toy robot out of wires and metal

There's probably more to this list but this is all I can think of as of now.

"Cutie Patootie" - M.Kim

Taken from my dear sister Moon's blog

Posted on April 13, 2011 by moonkyungpkim

gchat convo:
me: lol
you’re reall cute
really*
Frances: hah
aww i dont really think so (i think you are tho!) but thaaaanks
i hope my future husband will think im cute too! (even tho i know i dont need him to cuz God already thinks so)

ehehehehehe

What a cutie patootie. I bet your future husband will. ^_______^ And it IS great that God already thinks we’re cute. How lucky we are.

Awwwww thanks Moon! 1 <3 u

"Freedom" - F.Khai

Tuesday, April 12, 2011

Freedom

"You are not obsessed with what other people think of you when you are overwhelmed with the fact that God is thinking about you all the time.

You don’t have to hide your own sin when you are already thankful for God’s forgiveness."

It's about this vertical connection. The enemy keeps telling us we're still slaves. Sometimes we just gotta snap back, "Fool, there ain't no chains on me" 8).

Posted by F.Khai at 1:20 AM

I'm So In Love...

... with my Savior!!!

Today we sang this song at church. I'm listening to it online right now on Youtube and practicing it on the guitar. The words are simple but very sweet and sincere. This is my heart's prayer - today and always. ♥

You are God in heaven
And here am I on earth,
So I'll let my words be few:
Jesus I am so in love with You.

And I'll stand in awe of You,
Yes I'll stand in awe of You,
And I'll let my words be few:
Jesus I am so in love with You.

The simplest of all love songs
I want to bring to You,
So I'll let my words be few:
Jesus I am so in love with You.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=12z4dvc2kjo&feature=related
(I like this version :)

Joyful

I'm feeling quite happy at the moment. A lot happened this week - things around me, inside me, things done for me, things I had to do. But yeah, I'm pretty happy and thankful right now. After chemistry lab today I got to share the Gospel and just talk about God and His awesomeness and life and what I believe in with my lab partner Sterling for like, over an hour. I was soooo excited! It's actually been on my heart for a while now to share with him the Gospel and my faith, but for some reason it never really happened until this Friday afternoon. So I thank You God for answering my prayer and making it finally happen. we talked about many many topics: sin, creationism, God's fairness, 2012, joy peace purpose contentment true love eternal life... one thing that I really got to share and expound on was happiness vs. joy. In light of what I've been experiencing (and also what we've been studying through the Beth Moore study on fruit of the Holy Spirit), it was pretty neato to share with him the difference between the two - how happiness depends on our environment and things that happen to us, but joy is everlasting and not contingent upon our externals... that even though we may be sad, we can still have joy in our hearts, or we may be momentarily unhappy but we're able to get over that and move on because we have joy in Christ Jesus. Here I also tied in hope in Christ and also the great great reassurance of knowing that we are LOVED by God... that nothing can separate us from the Love of our Father - not even life nor death, angels nor demons, height nor depth, not even SATAN or anything else in this entire world can separate us from the Love of God. (I showed him Romans 8:38-39)

I feel really happy and encouraged by God that I got to share with my lab partner and am glad that he's interested and asking many questions and seems very open to hearing. Of course I pray that he'll hear all this and RECEIVE this gift and believe in Jesus so he can also experience this eternal joy and relationship with God that's only possible through Jesus Christ. I'm looking forward to Part 2 of our conversation next week, too, since we had to end short because he had an eye appointment. Just got off the phone with one of my leaders (he's also my EV-ing buddy on Berkeley campus on Wednesday afternoons) and shared with him what happened today; the both of us are very encouraged indeed! :)

I'm also really thankful (and joyful!) that I'm doing better than Tuesday hehe. Feel more recentered on Christ, though I still have my struggles here and there. I'm just so enamored with Jesus and all that He is to me, all that He's done for me, all that He will do for me... just absolutely amazing and beyond description. I'm His BELOVED! Oh yeah, in Russian class on Wednesday we learned how to say "beloved" in Russian: любимая (pronounced "lubimaya") -feminine, the masculine is любимый (pronounced "lubimuy"). I loooove that word, so much that I wrote it on my hand with a heart (although my Russian teacher said that it's a term that's rarely used because it's very antiquated and old and people just say "bf/gf" or "spouse" these days). I was telling my friends Tammy and Victor one time that I sorta want a tatoo that says "beloved" haha to always remind me that I am forever God's beloved.

I'm also reeeeeally thankful for Wednesday night after Large Group! I received help on graphing on Excel, I was fed, and I was driven home... and earlier that day I was sort of feeling sickly/nauseous but definitely much better afterwards. So much undeserved grace from God. Ahhhh I feel so blessed :)

I feel pretty stupid because of the feelings I'm feeling in my heart. Sigh... this too shall pass.

Okay barricade/fort-building not really working right now... what to do??!! I don't know what to do... God help me!

Recentering Myself

Just got home afterschool. (What happened to the warm yellow sun-shiney sun?!) So today throughout my physiology lecture, I couldn't help but inadvertently space out (on and off) on my professor while he was lecturing. Twas pretty bad... especially because I'm sorta lost about the renal system and renal exchange mechanisms and regulation of renal output and blah blah blah... but I couldn't help my mind from wandering off, daydreaming about something...... or someone. YYYeaahhh so pretty much opposite of what I want my heart to be doing at this point in my life. Especially because I made a commitment to God. So after class in the library, I turned to the Word and re-read one of my favorite passages in Psalm 73:25-26:

Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.

My flesh and heart have certainly failed today (and many days in the past as well), but I'm so glad that God is the strength of my heart. He's the One who helps me focus and get back on track and not think about ________. He's the One who loves me forever and is jealous for my love and attention. He's the One who is my security and joy and provision, my portion forever. And He's the One who still loves me even when I do think about _______ (but don't want to!) because He's the eternal Lover of my soul. I'm so blessed to be loved by my Creator King -- to be His beloved. And right now, He's the One who is gonna help me re-center myself back onto Himself.

Okay I'm gonna go practice guitar now for a little bit and then get cracking on my physio lab report on the renal system (gotta appreciate 'em kidneys!!). Praying that I won't think about _______..... and watching The Adjustment Bureau last night certainly doesn't help my situation because as much as I don't wanna admit it, I think I sometimes am sort of a hopeless romantic and a sucker for Hollywood romantic stuff (some). But now, back to building a barricade/fort around my heart...

Up So Early

Last night I went to sleep at 11pm, which is the earliest time that I slept this entire week of Spring Break. Dunno why but I woke up this morning around 3:30am and cannot go back to sleep =/ So I started reading Psalms, namely Ps 62, 63, and 67 - the one that talks about "let the nations be glad!" (V-SET article hehe). I tried turning off the lamp and going back to sleep, praying, listening to iPod... didn't work. Then I checked my email and ended up watching this really touching video on the Kimyal tribal people in Papua New Guinea receiving Bibles for the very first time! I'm so touched in my heart and moved to tears by my awesome Kimyal brothers and sisters who love the Word of God soooo much! You should watch this video too if you have time and be blessed by it!

http://thegospelcoalition.org/blogs/justintaylor/2011/03/03/what-does-it-look-like-to-receive-the-new-testament-for-the-first-time/

Hmmmm I think I know why I can't go back to sleep: I'm hungry :P
(Only had one meal yesterday - dinner)