Two Years

Today marks 2 whole years since the break-up.  I'm still alive and even doing well - PRAISE THE LORD!  That event and everything that followed over the span of the past 2 years was probably the most painful, heartbreaking thing I've ever experienced, but looking back, I'm super grateful for all that the Lord brought me through in His sovereignty, perfect wisdom, and loving care.  All that happened in the past two years was what my Father thought was best for me.  What a special time of precious sanctification - coming face to face with my deeply gross and disgusting sins and ugly pride, learning true repentance, experiencing and receiving God's abundant grace that pardons and cleanses within, growing in Christ likeness...

I have grown SOOOO MUCH (I can feel it!) - and it's all by God's grace.  He has grown me in areas of acceptance, contentment, forgiveness, thankfulness, joy, trust in God; putting to death self, idols, pride, anger, bitterness, unforgiveness... I am beyond grateful.  I know my Lord Jesus more intimately and deeply than I did two years ago.  I know the power of His resurrection more than I did two years ago.  I can say that I had the privilege and joy to share in His sufferings a little more than I did two years ago.

Even though T's not in my life anymore (at least not in the same way), I have Christ and that is enough!  Christ is sufficient for me!  He is everything to me; all I have is Christ.  And He is the reason why I am able to move forward - with my eyes fixed on my True and Eternal Love: Jesus.

:)

See you in Heaven, Eisabeth Elliot

Stranded at SFO because my flight to LAX got delayed (what's new for Southwest?). Visited my favorite website only to discover the sad-yet-joyful-at-the-same-time news that Elisabeth Elliot passed away yesterday morning. John Piper writes a good tribute to her in this post: http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/peaches-in-paradise

I own Shadow of the Almighty and Passion and Purity, though have yet to finish reading through them both. I remember I was in the middle of Passion and Purity during my first year of nursing school. It was April 2012, right around the time that a particular classmate took interest in me... Seems like ages ago.

Happy 30th Birthday to a very special friend! :D :)

Jesus Loves Me

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=c8gKXu6J2wE

Really loving this new Chris Tomlin song "Jesus Loves Me".  Been replaying it on loop on Youtube last night while packing, and the night before, and at the moment.

The Greatest Gift Is God Himself

"God offers his presence when I want his presents." -Vaneetha Rendall 

My heart felt like :) after I read this blog post

http://www.desiringgod.org/articles/the-greatest-gift-is-god-himself

Sick on Easter Sunday

I've been confined to bed rest the past several days due to a severe case of viral gastroenteritis.  Been feeling nauseous, dizzy, weak and lethargic, achy in my back and abdomen, headaches, feverish, diaphoretic, chills, lack of appetite, bloating, and many episodes of diarrhea.  Had to call in sick at work twice, couldn't attend Good Friday service, and was bummed that I was still diarrhea-ing this morning when I woke up on Easter Sunday.  I sure am thankful for my church's livestream, which I'm listening to right now.  Although I sure wanted to have gone in person to my Father's house to worship Him this Resurrection Sunday along with the other saints and prayed last night that I would wake up today feeling better so I could go to church.  I'm sure God has a good reason to say no to my prayer though.  Pastor John is preaching on saving faith - how it will endure to the end and cannot be destroyed.  This is the perseverance of the saints.  A true believer is marked by saving faith and obedience.  Lord, I am thankful this morning for the death and resurrection of Jesus Christ my Savior.  I am also thankful that You in Your mercy, grace, kindness, and love have made me a true believer.  Please help me to be more obedient to You, no matter the circumstance.

Here's an excellent quote I found on Tim Challies's website by Charles Spurgeon:

Heaven will be full of the ceaseless praises of Jesus. Eternity! thine unnumbered years shall speed their everlasting course, but forever and for ever, “to him be glory.” Is he not a “Priest for ever after the order of Melchizedek”? “To him be glory.” Is he not king for ever?—King of kings and Lord of lords, the everlasting Father? “To him be glory for ever.” Never shall his praises cease. That which was bought with blood deserves to last while immortality endures. The glory of the cross must never be eclipsed; the lustre of the grave and of the resurrection must never be dimmed. O Jesus! thou shalt be praised for ever. Long as immortal spirits live—long as the Father’s throne endures—for ever, for ever, unto thee shall be glory. Believer, you are anticipating the time when you shall join the saints above in ascribing all glory to Jesus; but are you glorifying him now? The apostle’s words are, “To him be glory both now and for ever.” Will you not this day make it your prayer? “Lord, help me to glorify thee; I am poor, help me to glorify thee by contentment; I am sick, help me to give thee honour by patience; I have talents, help me to extol thee by spending them for thee; I have time, Lord, help me to redeem it, that I may serve thee; I have a heart to feel, Lord, let that heart feel no love but thine, and glow with no flame but affection for thee; I have a head to think, Lord, help me to think of thee and for thee; thou hast put me in this world for something, Lord, show me what that is, and help me to work out my life-purpose: I cannot do much, but as the widow put in her two mites, which were all her living, so, Lord, I cast my time and eternity too into thy treasury; I am all thine; take me, and enable me to glorify thee now, in all that I say, in all that I do, and with all that I have.”

Great Quote I Love

Sent to me by one of the precious girls I disciple:

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Still he shows his freedom and lordship by discriminating between sinners, causing some to hear the gospel while others do not hear it, and moving some of those who hear it to repentance while leaving others in their unbelief, thus teaching his saints that he owes mercy to none and that it is entirely of his grace, not at all through their own effort, that they themselves have found life.

Still he blesses those on whom he sets his love in a way that humbles them, so that all the glory may be his alone. 

Still he hates the sins of his people, and uses all kinds of inward and outward pains and griefs to wean their hearts from compromise and disobedience.

Still he seeks the fellowship of his people, and sends them both sorrows and joys in order to detach their love from other things and attach it to himself.

Still he teaches believers to value his promised gifts by making them wait for those gifts, and compelling them to pray persistently for them, before he bestows them.

- J.I. Packer

Missions

When it comes to missions, give God a blank check.  -David Platt

Missions exist because worship of God doesn't.  -John Piper

The question is not whether you will die.  The question is whether the death you die will bear much fruit.  -John Piper

He is no fool who gives what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose.  -Jim Elliot

If anyone would come after me, he must deny himself and take up his cross daily and follow me.         -Jesus Christ